emo

its always a problem.
its never something happy.
the fact that life is there, but not being enjoyed.
its just the way it is.
and when people who fail are meant to fail, they will keep on failing.

im fortunate, in ways i dont see how.
but once i take a step away, i think i see it.
everybody's meant to be used. no doubt bout that.
but its whether or not you feel happy being used and using at the same time.
and then there's the awkward morning after.
would you pick a boring night over an awkward morning?

im always a hanger.
a cliffhanger.
its always hanging over the same things.
trying to hang on.
jokes, sarcasm, insults.
its always the same.
nothings different, just the people and the time.
the feeling will always be the same.
uninvited, not welcomed.

i just wish, id stop being insecure.
stand up for myself, insult to as i was, joke with as you did.
so what is happiness?