unexpected twists in life

its inevitable how certain paths and plots of life appear to be.
one second we're visiting dear ones. the next, we're trying to accept the fact that they're gone. forever.
an afterlife probably never existed. so we have to learn how to bid farewell. for good.
the afterlife concept was probably created so that we wouldn't worry too much about something we held dear to ourselves. like that pet frog that followed you in your pocket everywhere. until it went somewhere far away. your parents probably couldn't break the news to you. knowing how kids had tantrums the size of cloverfield.
we slowly adopted this as we journey further. its as if we're taking an alternate route. the easier way. the short cut.
we just hope that acceptance would come easy. if only we had time to realise when we're lying on the death bed. thinking back of the loved ones that moved on before us.
where had they gone? some utopia? crafted by the consciousness that always has something to fear leading us to believe in something more relieving. but fallacy altogether. not entirely true. which equals a lie.

i wish. in that many years of my life. i had brought some happiness. at least some.
as i stared at that blank, expressionless face. i saw nothing. the once cheerful grandfather that used to play the piano, amuse me and my siblings. now gone.
i did little. to compensate. for there may be greater sacrifices unaware of.
as time passed by, expressions deteriorated from his face.
any signs of recognition deleted. he could barely identify any of his daughters. my mother. not even his grandchildren.
for he once told my mother his secret to his marriage.
never fight in front of the children.
RIP.