i want a break, a break from speculations, a break from observations, a break from judgements based on circumstantial evidence, a break from making moves, a break from convincing, a break from self-deception, a break from words, a break from severe allergic reactions, a break from being frail metaphorically, a break from not being intellectual enough, a break from not being able to relate, a break from not wanting to feel anything anymore, a break from a break, a break from lies, a break from life, a break from being intoxicated, a break from thinking of you, a break from thinking of us, a break from myself, give me a break. bye, interweb ):
if it's so hard to maintain something, just back out. don't lie to yourself. don't even come up with words of reassurance. just continue aggravating the situations with "whatevers" as you always. if you're not happy, don't even try, just go.
it kinda sucks knowing that things wouldn't be the same anymore, we knew that just before you left. it kinda sucks knowing that i can't tell her what i feel just because i didn't want an awkward moment, which i had anyways. it kinda sucks knowing that i'm writing this because i don't know what else or how else to say it. it kinda sucks that half a can of beer got me good. it kinda sucks that i'm fighting for something just because i didn't want her to lose. it kinda sucks that i don't know what to do. it kinda sucks that it kinda sucks.....
don't like to read this? disagree with my thoughts? have something better to say? please comment. :D
anyways. some people change as time passes. for example. they show their true colors; just because they feel like a shit, they disregard everything around them. they become cocky with their mouth, and call names that they think is suitable even though provocative and downright insulting. stand back and watch? work your mouth? or maybe even some fists? >_> gtfo.
sometimes it's not really about what i want, but rather what you want. if i subject myself to you, i will try my level best; although quite shitty a magnitude, to comprehend and fulfil your needs. thing with me is that i lose my virtues and not say a thing about it whenever i put up with you, because that's what guys do.
sure, it's easy to get in a relationship, but i want to maintain it and you're not making it any easier for me. ie, plans with me can be put on hold, while others come first, consecutively. it would've been a different scenario if it happened occasionally. you'd expect me to be there for you when you aren't there yourself.
it's chaotic yeah, but i try to subdue myself to your principles, no matter how much i detest it, it's a give-and-take thing. sure, you have a short attention span; so do i. so does everybody else in the world. we just have more control over those sort of things. don't do upon others what you wouldn't want to receive from.
it's simple. sure, my tongue slipped many times, and i'm thankful that i'm still able to please you. i guess i'm lucky because i'm funny, otherwise, i bet things would end differently. maybe it's a test, i don't care. i never once doubted any actions, i believe in a reason. apparently yours involve avoiding any sort of confrontation.
regarding the usage of the universal four letter term of endearment, i think that you only use it whenever i'm able to please you in some way. to tell you the truth, i'm only standing by because you promised that you wouldn't break me. you tell me about your wants and desires. ever wondered why i didn't have any?
"opposites do attract, although there are tendencies of otherwise. nobody is perfect, but i think you define perfect"
i can't ... Stop writing emotional, sympathetic posts. Stop feeling like a failure. Tell when to say the right things or the right time to say them.
i can Shuffle. :D Sing chinese songs. :D
i won't Let go if i can. Give up until i have to.
i will Persevere if i am able. Hold on tight until it's time i became dispensable.
i shouldn't Post this. Think about this. Lose sleep over a matter of this nature.
i should Fall asleep right about now. Open my books soon.