i hate relationships

it always turns out complicated.
at the cost of losing someone you can relate so well to.
so the real question here is whether counterparts should complete you by being so alike or completing in other aspects unknown to.
it's not the commitment.
something larger than life?

life as he knew it

he thought that life would be better after high school, always fixated on the worse aspects of events.
he had a party, he thought of the presents.
he went for a gathering, and thought of how nobody would stand up for him.
all he had traverse, he thought.
he was ready for anything.
or so he thought.
he wasn't. he fucked up just as bad as he did in high school.
even after his second chance.
friends. are only there when they need you.

those who are there whether you need them or not. appreciate them.
but then again, you don't know whether they're needing you.
so what if he trusted his friends, when they didn't have the slightest towards him.
he was a sitting duck, waiting to be blown by a shotgun, in the form of another duck.

what's the point of this post?
he wish he truly knew why.